A year ago today, I plucked up the courage to press publish on Kindle - it didn't take long for Little Girl to go live. My first-born. New parent jitters. It was an experiment, I really didn't think anything would come of it, but I wanted to try it anyway - I like to learn and I like staying off the main road. People said indies won't sell. Horror won't sell. Short stories won't sell. Flash fiction definitely won't sell, particularly the dark stuff. I kept hearing things like only hiring a good editor and cover designer will convince people to take you seriously. *Dun-dun-DUN*
I uploaded a piss poor cover. There's been four or five covers for that poor little book so far. This one has stuck. I had a terrible description, awful promotional skills and an entire lack of media awareness or writerly friends. I didn't even tell my family I was writing again - they know now but they aren't going to read my work, never mind give me a dodgy review. ;) I chose a pen name and for months sweated in case anyone knew it was me. *Insert eye roll here*
I sold something like five copies of the book in the first month. Got into the forum thing, wasn't comfortable with the extreme spamming/bitchiness/negativity, was and still am quite vocal about it, moved on to other places. Discovered that there are people who are on the side of indies, despite the bad reputation, and got over how bummed I was about the bad atmospheres. *Takes things to heart*
Took a good few months before I started to get daily sales - thanks to my first reviews. Decided marketing wasn't a good path for me. Gave up on the book completely - I actually said those words to my OH. Tried to fit in online. Didn't. Focused on a novel. Still haven't finished said novel and probably never will. *Cannot edit to save her life*
Little Girl got lots of angry reviews. I took advice from some people way smarter than me, copped on, changed the cover to the present one and came up with something resembling an actual product description. Learned to dread review numbers increasing but also realised the bad reviews were probably encouraging sales. Got down about the way people act online sometimes. Remembered life's too short for that. Stepped away from forums/facebook/twitter. *Iz dramatic*
Remembered that the whole point of the indie thing was to forge my own path. Palm-slapped myself. Figured out my own plan, the one that had been shouting at me while I was listening to everyone else's plans. Knuckled down. Joined ROW80. Was shocked by the positivity. Was inspired too. Heard from some other writers and readers who either said or did things that reassurred me not everyone in the world is a dick. Again. Got over myself. Again. Wrote my ass off. Not again. Realised it's March. Counted a year's sales. More than I expected. More than half in the last two months. *Is shocked*
Lesson: Maybe there is no lesson. I did nothing in the end. I don't come close to the good 'uns in skill, talent, personality or sales. And any good that came to me came because of the actions of others, not me so basically the point is I'm not a good example of anything? Erm. :D A year on, I still don't have a novel out, I'm still working alone while the world sleeps and I still have no idea what I'm doing. Actually, that's not really true. I know the plan, it just doesn't make sense to anyone else. ;)
I'm going to keep doing nothing - aside from being myself, writing and trying to become the best writer I can be. I've learned a lot, about the business, the craft, other people, myself. I might be a little braver, hopefully I'll work a little harder with a lot less ego, and for now I'll just pat my wee book on the back and say, that'll do book, that'll do.